Thursday, January 24, 2013

Pet Peeves

  At present, I live with my ex-wife. Call it economic hardship or anything else with a politically correct label. We were married from 1999 thru 2003. Together on and off afterwards depending on my alcoholic nature.
  She turned 52 this past Sunday but was 'grandfathered-in', two years ago when she bought this condo in a 55+ community. 1 bed/1 bath. 700 square feet. It has already taken a lot of ingenuity to fit 'ten pounds of crap in a two pound bag', with both our belongings. [Not so much of mine because I have lost so much in life and am used to being thrown out or departing with a backpack and running away.]
  I am a jack of all trades with an engineering background. I presently work around the neighborhood at my leisure and clienteles' beck and call for home maintenance, repairs, installations and whatnot. At home, I do all the cooking, cleaning, laundry, organizing, yes I even have my own sewing machine etc, etc.

Therein lies the rub...

  Ex-wife Jodi, has a son from her first marriage. He is now 28 with a girlfriend from college. She set her sights on him and now 'they' have two children. Four year old daughter, two year old son, and she has a six month old son from a one-night-stand when they were broken up for approximately three days. Give or take.
Mismanagement of funds and bad decisions all around they now live with us-illegally by condo standards. The cat is out of the bag and they have to get out by February 1st. They have been here since mid October!!!
  This house is not child-proof. There are too many ceramic lighthouse memorabilia curios and nick-nacks. Not to mention my guitars, equipment, and art supplies. We never had problems when babysitting for them because we are attentive and spend the whole time interacting with the grandkids.
  Them living here became a different story. I have sequestered and self imprisoned myself in my bedroom. My office space, Jodi's office space, the kitchen,bathroom, and what used to be a living room has been trashed.TRASHED.
  Used to be, I couldn't wait for everyone to leave by 7am. One so I could turn off the air conditioning(can't stand it for extended periods as a south florida native raised without it), & Two, to air the place out, so I could clean. I used to affix the high-end futon we have and bring everything back to living room stature. Clean up all the discarded sippy cups, sweep, mop and sanitize. 

I gave up.

  Two months ago I bought a true Hepi-filter air cleaner. Kids coming home from day care, everyone having sneezing fits in the morning and all that. Found the perfect focal point to place it felt I was making a difference in our health. Came to realize I did not find the filter replacement costs worth the time this circus would be in town, I turned it off.

Fuck that.

  Fixing something that isn't right, comes second nature to me.
I don't think I have OCD. Something on a shelf doesn't have to sit 'just so'. But I am old school. You use something, put it back where you got it from.

I have been guilty
Of kicking myself in the teeth
I will bring no more
Of my feelings beneath.
alice in chains


Dirty diapers don't  belong in a wastebasket that doesn't get changed but once a week.

And then she just left everything astrew.
Never cleaned mountains of hair all across every room. Bottles of day old formula left behind the couch turn my stomach faster than a decomposing body.

I get to a point.
Mentally.
I know everyone sees that piece of garbage/debris, lingering in the hallway. you pass it every day. it is yours. pick up your garbage. it kills me to leave it there. but i have to tell myself.

No

Don't do it.
Walk away.

Hair on a shelf, plain as day in the refrigerator.
the miceowave......


is driving me apeshit.

she better move out soon
or someone is going over
the balcony....

probably me

as usual
thrown out again

because i am just not

right.
||||/












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